Get Involved...

To those that don't know, I live in New England... its freezing here, and I don't mean the weather! Living in this area is no cake walk for the christian, republican, homeschooling, America loving, small government desiring mama like myself! Thankfully I'm not alone. I know that there are other moms out there with the same beliefs, standards and desires for their families! My father gave me a link to a website to check out recently and I finally feel a little warmth up here in frigid state of Massachusetts! If you're able to, check it out... you'll be blessed!!!

www.asamom.org

Ok God! You got my attention!

As a woman I often struggle with the difference between God's will and my own emotion! This past week has been a tough one, I thought for sure that doors would open, and that other's would close. Yesterday God got my attention in a way that I never expected and I now know that for my husband and I, it is not God's will for us to continue to worry and be anxious and try to intervene where we are not meant to. My nephew is still in the system, he will celebrate his first birthday away from his mama. This breaks my heart and somehow gives me peace. I've learned that my place is no longer on the front lines trying to live my sister in laws life, but rather on my knees. All I can do now is step back, thank God for my sweet boys, and ask the Lord to give her just enough grace for today...tomorrow has troubles all its own, but if she can do the right thing today, then she's one day closer to that baby! You got my attention Lord...

Big Changes

Its been forever since my last post, so here goes! Big things are happening in our family, we recently started our very first year of homeschooling (which I am loving and so are the boys), we found out that we ARE able to put an addition on my parents house, so we'll be moving sometime before the holidays and my sweet sister in law found out she's expecting!!! All super exciting things, and I cannot wait to see what God has in store for us!

There are also some things that are hanging in the balance, waiting for God's hand to work them out. I'll try to make a the short version... eleven months ago my sister in law (not the one that's expecting :) ) gave birth to the sweetest little boy ever. Unfortunately for him and our family, mom made some very unhealthy choices while little one was in utero and he was born very sick. Due to these choices he is currently in the custody of our (not so) great state. My husband and I have struggled greatly in this and his family has endured a lot of heartache. This week is one of many court dates that we've waited through. The difference this time around is we are hoping that the state will be looking to place this little one for long term, or even seek termination of moms rights. Papa Bear and I are more than ready to open our hearts and home to this little one (again {long story}) but know that it can only happen if it is Gods will. That's where it gets difficult, naturally I want to call anyone who will listen and demand that he be placed with us right now, but we've learned the hard way that choosing not to listen to God has some consequences. So right now I have peace, peace in knowing that whatever the outcome may be this week, it's in His hands, not mine. Big changes....

Super Mom?

Isn't it so strange how everything changes when your a mom? You could be the most reserved, timid, scared of everything person in the world and once you have a child you immediately turn into super mom! For example, after having my boys, I no longer "think" when an event takes place! I immediately go into action! For example, when my 4 (almost 5 :D) year old falls and splits open his head...I don't stop and panic, I quickly apply pressure to head right to the ER (then completely melt down once the stitches are in)! When my 3 year old shoves a toy waaaay up into his nose, and my husband has a heart attack, I stay cool, forcing him to blow it out as I block one nostril. And of course in situations like last night when after putting a pizza in the toaster oven, I realized that there was in fact a fire in my toaster oven, I didn't freak out, I put it out (and then freaked out)!!!

It's actually kind of neat how God gives us this bold spirit! Hopefully these aren't regular occurrences in my journey as a mom, but I least I know I can handle the small stuff!

And the occasional fat lip...

Wordless Wednesday

Isaac's Emo Artwork.

Survival Mode

So normally on Wednesday Papa Bear works a long day, today just happened to be a suuuuper loooong day! He's gone until long after bedtime, thus, I am now in survival mode! The boys have been climbing the walls all summer! We've had more rain this summer than I can remember in my 26 years of summers! Its crazy! And lets face it, when its pouring, you can't do too much! So today we headed out for some much needed sun, fresh air and imagination!

I wont lie, I am a fan of controlled chaos! We opted to head out to make some "art"!

Exhibit A:

Notice our very fashionable smocks that we made from old pillow cases!!!

God Hath Not Promised...

God hath not promised, skies always blue

Flower strewn pathways, all our lives through

God hath not promised, sun without rain

Joy without sorrow, peace without pain

God hath not promised, we shall not know

Toil and temptation, trouble and woe

God hath not told us, we shall not bear

Many a burden, many a care

God hath not promised, smooth roads and wide

Swift easy travel, needing no guide

Never a mountain, rocky and steep

Never a river, turbid and deep

But God hath promised, strength for the day

Rest for the labor, light for the way

Grace for the trials, help from above

Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

I love love love this poem! Its such a perfect reminder to me that no matter what trials and tribulations that come my way, that God will give me perfect peace, grace that abounds and all the love I can imagine!

It's been an odd week, I feel like everyone that I speak to is going through "something". The air is thick and we know that enemy is out on the prowl. I've been doing my best to pray for those that are struggling, to be an encouragement, a blessing, and then yesterday we found out that our sweet Mimi has cancer.

Mimi is one of the most precious souls I know, she puts everyone above herself and loves my boys to absolute pieces! This news didn't come as too much of a surprise, she is 82 years young and has been blessed with great health up until yesterday. Our sweet Mimi isn't a believer and that for us (as Christians) makes the diagnosis a little harder.

Thankfully, God is in control! We have no idea what the prognosis is going to be. We know that we're here, ready to be used in whatever way we can, and we're hopeful! Thank goodness for God's kind care!!!

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday

Well, semi wordless Wednesday. My brother is his fabulous wife surprised us with a visit this week, and I am so thanful to have them home! Love you guys!!!

I am totally new to "not me Monday" but the good Lord knows I have plenty to share! For example, just this morning, I certainly did not allow my four year old to eat pizza for breakfast because we were out of English muffins!

On Saturday night, after being at a cookout all day, I definitely did not put both of my children to bed with dirty feet. I totally didn't forget that they were filthy in the morning and then let them go to church like that!!!

I would never ever let my little one roast marshmallows for dinner after he refused to eat a hot dog... never...

The other day, I did not turn beat red when Big Bigs pulled a pad out of my pocket book and blatantly asked me if it was a "diaper for a really little person"! And to top it off, I certainly didn't tell him yes in order to avoid that conversation!

I do have to admit, this is very therapeutic!

My Legacy

I want to leave a legacy,
How will they remember me?
Did I chose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering,
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy.

This song always makes me think of my kids. I know for sure that I want to leave a legacy for Jesus Christ, but also for my family, so this got me thinking. Some day, not to soon I pray, my children are going to grow up. They are going to leave this home, they'll embark on a world that can be rough, they will marry the women that God sees fit, and they will one day have children of their own (OK, seriously depressing, but its true). When that time comes I want to be able to give my boys a piece of me to take with them on their new travels. Now this is certainly an epiphany that I should of had five years ago, but better late than never!

I want to create my legacy, a book, full of memories and keepsakes. I plan to begin this project in the very near future! I want to start it with a letter to each of my boys telling them how amazing God is and how unbelievably joyful and thankful I am to be there mom. I want to incorporate special events, be it as simple as a day at the aquarium, or as personal as a wedding. I want them to know, in my words, what they mean to me. The values that I am now instilling in their sweet hearts. The trials and the laughter. Now I know your thinking this sounds a lot like a scrapbook, I agree! I do scrapbook, but this is different! I wish I had something like this to reflect on my childhood! I also understand that my boys may not find this as endearing as it sounds, but someday they are going to marry a beautiful young woman who will undoubtedly appreciate this. To be able to read about all the memories and values and traits that were and still are being instilled in their husband... how awesome?

So those are my thoughts!!! I really look forward to this new endeavor, one that I have absolutely no time for, but I'm going to make time. I hope you'll join me in creating you're own legacy!

Happy 4th of July!!!!

Well, it's technically tomorrow, but you know what I mean!!! I am really looking forward to tomorrow, and even more excited to be able to teach my boys why we even celebrate Independence Day! I have to say, that as an American I am SO thankful that God saw fit to allow me to live in such a great nation, so thankful that I can go to my church and worship my God, that I am able to have the choice to not vaccinate my boys, to home school them,to raise them in a christian home, to share my faith with a complete stranger...and the list goes on. We are certainly beyond blessed here in America and not a day goes by where I am not thankful for the men and women that gave everything for me to be able to achieve anything.

Wordless Wednesday:

(brotherly love...totally not staged) :)

I lost...

You ever have those days where you're just tired, weary, sick of everything? Today was one of those days! I have been carrying a lot lately...stuff that doesn't even belong to me to be exact. Someone else's burden. I find myself being the type of person that tries to "fix" everything. I'm learning the hard way that some situations are best left in God's hands and not my own. So today I battled with God. I got mad. I was frustrated. I fought. And I lost. And I have to admit, I haven't felt this much peace in a while.

God's in control, that's all that matters...

Summer + Milk = YUCK

I love summer! I love the warm weather, the sunshine, the bbq's, watermelon and so on. But there is one thing that I totally hate about the heat...sippy cups with milk that has not been drunk (elgh)! This year I think I am boycotting milk until at least October! I don't know if it's because we only drink organic milk, but it seems to spoil a million times faster. And leave it to Little Bigs to take a few sips of his favorite drink and somehow misplace the cup just long enough to grow a cure for cancer inside! Ahh, the joys of summer!

Who Am I?

"Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, would care to know my name..."

It's no secret that I love Casting Crowns, but this song makes me stop in my tracks! Who am I? To think that the God of the universe, the God that holds the world in the palm of his hand, would be mindful of ME! It's almost impossible to wrap your mind around...its humbling!

I've learned a lot about myself this year. I've learned that I can't fix everything, or everyone. I've learned that prayer covers a multitude of sins. I've learned to be submissive (well, It's a work in progress). To listen. To not allow my emotions to control my day. But most importantly, I'm learning to be still. "Be still and know that I am God" How often do we make the time to truly be still? To sit in a quiet room and allow God to be Sovereign? I feel like on a daily basis I have a million things on my plate. But who am I, to think for a single second, that I don't have time to be still in front of the One who cares to know my name?

Happy Mother's Day!

My day was perfect, spent exactly how I hoped...woke up to mother's day wishes from my papa bear and my boys, went to church (which was awesome) and then dinner with my own mom! Perfection. Every year seems to get a little more rewarding. I can get used to this! Hope your day was just as special!

Because I'm Thankful!

It's raining out today...one of many rainy days this week.

It's interesting how the rain makes you think, makes you sit down and relax and let your mind wander. For me personally, I've been thinking about how blessed I am. Every night when I sit down to watch the local news there's a child that's died, a family that's lost it all in a fire, another school shooting...depressing really. Then I turn on the computer and see a headline "Father kills wife, 2 kids and self", "Swine Flu" and so on. It's hard to find happiness online or on TV, but thankfully I'm able to find the blessing. The more I see and read, the more I realize that God is sovereign. Nothing happens without Him knowing, not a single sparrow falls, not a rain drop hits the ground, not a child going home to be with Him, nothing happens without God knowing. That, that brings me peace. The day to day life can be stressful and tiring. Parenting can be draining and overwhelming at times, but there's always a blessing.

I've learned to be thankful in all things! All things you say? Yes. All things. When I'm having an ongoing battle with my 4 year old because he wants to eat a hot pocket for breakfast, I'm thankful. When my 3 year cries when the wind blows for no reason, I'm thankful. When my husband forgets to take out the trash (again), I'm thankful. Your probably wondering by now what I could possibly be thankful for? I'm thankful because they're here, because they're healthy, because I have an opportunity to step back and appreciate them. The more I see on TV and on the computer, even other blogs, the more I'm thankful. I think to myself, my goodness, I bet there are moms out there that would give anything to have one more battle with their 4 year old. To hear their little one cry for no reason at all, but just to hear them again. To take out the trash because their husband forgot to and not because he's no longer here. I am blessed, and I don't take it for granted, not for a minute.

So today I'll turn off the TV and shut down the computer. I'll build a castle out of blocks, I'll make a police station with the Lego's, I'll cook grilled cheese sandwiches shaped like stars, I'll turn the Imagination Movers up nice and loud and pretend I can dance, I'll read Green Eggs and Ham, I'll color a picture and I will praise God...because I'm thankful! (did I mention I'll take out the trash)!

Boring, I know!

Life as we know it has been pretty low key lately! We took the kids to the beach for the first time this year (it was freezing, by the way). We collected shells and rocks to paint for our garden...yes, I said garden! Be advised I by no means have a green thumb! Maybe a little more like a blue thumb? I want to be able to plant things without killing them, I want to see my flowers bloom, and my strawberries grow. The odds of any of those things coming to be is extremely slim, but still, I will garden!

Since there really isn't much else going on, I'll leave you with a little something sweet...

This afternoon I overheard Big Bigs getting ready to pray. He lowered his head and folded his hands, I quietly looked on and heard him say "Dear Jesus, thank you for the ice cream mommy gave us today, I really wish I had a rocket, I love you...do you love me? In Jesus name, Amen."

Slacker!!!

So I guess this just proves that I wont be able to update this daily! In my defense, it was my birthday this week! This year was really awesome because the boys knew that it was birthday (and not because I reminded them...I swear!). When I got out of bed that morning both of the boys were quietly, yes I did say quietly, sitting at the table making pictures. When Big Bigs was through he proudly walked in to my room and handed me this...

Hands down BEST birthday present EVER! Not only did he think of me, but he made it without anyone (Papa Bear) telling him too! He even spelled everything on his own, which lets admit is pretty impressive!!!

This same day we decided to head to Target for a little birthday shopping! While we were in line waiting to check out Little Bigs smiles at the woman in front of us and decides even though he isn't allowed to talk to strangers, she looks like a good candidate to break the rules on. Now if I recall correctly, the conversation went something like this...

Little Bigs: "Hi, I'm Isaac, this is Tre"

Woman: "Hi Isaac, how are you?"

Little Bigs: "Good, I got a truck, look" (shows her the truck)

Woman: "Thats really neat, I have a little boy and a little girl"

Big Bigs: "You do? Wow. How old are you?"

Woman: (chuckles) "How old do you think I am?"

Big Bigs: "I think you're 40!"

Woman: "NO, I'm 32, how old is your mommy?"

Big Bigs: "She is 26"

Silence. That was the end... this woman was clearly offended by the fact that my 4 year old thought that she was 40 years old! Now being a mother of a little boy you'd think that she would take it in stride, but nope, 40 was just a number she couldn't handle! So wherever you are Target Lady, I apologize! You dont look a day over 39!

Better late than never!

So Easter came and went in no time at all this year! I find that as the kids get bigger I always try to out do the year before! Thankfully my husband keeps me in line in this department! This was also the first year where the kids were able to fully understand why we celebrate Easter, that it Isn't all about candy but it is all about God's grace. As a parent I so appreciate when my one of my boys walks up to me and says "mommy, it is so cool that Jesus rose from the dead!" It just shows me that we're doing something right! I hope that they always keep those kinds of perspectives on things, that they'll know that there is so much more to life than what the world portrays! I cherish these times and I know they wont last forever! Thankfully I tend to take pictures of everything...literally! I'll leave you with a few from Easter, enjoy!

Welcome to my "happy place"

Here we are, the middle of April, and as the holidays come and go I've decided that we need a way to keep everyone updated with our not so lively lives! Since we have family and friends in every nook and cranny of the Country, this seemed fitting! I promise to do my best to keep this as current as possible, but lets be honest with a preschooler, a toddler, a busy husband, a home and a church to help maintain it may be a little shakey! All I can promise is current thoughts, updated pictures, and all my love!



...welcome to my happy place...